crossoverfic | Roanapur Knights: A Buffy the Vampire Slayer / Black Lagoon tale

Roanapur Knights - A Black Lagoon / BTVS x-over

Author: B.H. Ramsay

Email : drgonzo124@hotmail.com

Disclaimer: Characters appearing here belong to Mutant Enemy & Funimation Entertainment

Rating: Adult

Pairings(s) various

Spoilers: many

Dedicated to: The Shrine of Heroes...may she endure forever & Unclejoe who has great ideas save one ....Rock and Revy 4evah. Respect to Greydon Creed and Randomonium who helped make me better & of course Demona, because that which does not kill you makes you stronger.

Summary: YA Xander didn't go to Oxnard fic -- When The Lagoon Company's latest job takes a turn for the dark and deadly they'll need the help of an old friend, Good thing Xander is bringing Faith along for the ride. It means he might survive the wrath of Revy when Two Hands finally catches up to the Zeppo who got away.
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Faith Lehane wrinkled her nose and, in a voice that would have done justice to Cordelia Chase had she been there, asked "So tell me again how it is you of all people know about this pig sty."

Faith was reacting to her first sight of Roanapur and Xander Harris had to admit the description was a fair one. True, he was a little more familiar with the place then Faith, but even he was surprised at how much. . . seedier the place seemed since last he had been here. Of course if the city had changed, so had he. His hair was cropped shorter and he was a lot more tanned and athletic then he had been that last visit . . .oh, and there was the whole missing eye thing. He was wearing the happy face eye-patch at Faith's request.

"Buffy ever tell you about the whole stripping in Oxnard incident?"

"I believe that tale was wormed out of her after I had poured an awesome about of booze down her throat," Faith recalled fondly.

"I was lying," Xander sighed, "I told her that so she would tell Willow and they wouldn’t ask about what I really got up to. I don't like it when they worry about me."

Faith cocked an eyebrow at this revelation. "Especially when you've been doing something stupid," She reminded him.

"Especially then, yes. Anyway, one of the stops on the magical misery tour was The South China Sea." He gestured grandly for effect.

"I'm still fuzzy on why we are in this shit-hole following rumours of lost Slayers," Faith snapped as she gestured wildly to the town surrounding them. "I mean, this looks like a set from one of those bad B-grade crap-fest movies you and Andrew insist on calling classics."

"I figured we might land a lead or three here," Xander said, trying to pacify her. "As it happens, you can buy almost anything in Roanapur and anything you can't buy, you can get information on."

"Won't we have to pay for info?" Faith asked doubtfully.

"That's the best part of coming here to search. In all likelihood whoever has our girls has an enemy willing to finance our search and destroy."

"Hey, not to rain on your parade but you do know I'm still technically ducking a murder rap," Faith reminded him. "If anything goes FUBAR'd, as it usually does for us, local cops might give us trouble."

Xander snorted at the thought of the morbidly corrupt Chief Watsup trying to arrest the Slayer, "In this town the cops couldn't care less if you kill someone right in front of them as long as you can afford the bribes to make the problem go away. You're here because more then any of the others you can blend in."

"So Faith must be on her best behaviour in the new town?" She snapped pointedly.

"Actually the complete opposite. If anyone even breathes on you funny, drop them and move on. Trust me, no one will care and they'll assume whoever it was had it coming."

"My kind of mission. Complete freedom to kick ass and no wringing of the hands afterwards. " Faith then looked at Xander quizzically, "Still. I know why I'm here, why are you here? I mean, this seems like the kind of mission you'd want to leave to Robin or Giles to deal with. Busting human traffickers seems a little hardcore for you."

"I'm here because I know Roanapur. Don't worry about the details; someone will eventually fill you in on everything that went down. Just trust me when I say that I got to know this place very well. I wanted you here because if I'm right and we are dealing with women who have been abused and enslaved, then even rescuing them won't be enough. They aren't going to listen to me, I need them to trust us and that means giving them someone who they can relate to. I want to get this right and that means you'll have to do the talking when we find and rescue these girls."

The two of them moved purposely though the town. Xander avoided making eye contact as much as possible. They went past Club Heart; Xander didn't recognize any of the girls out front, which didn't stop some of the more brazen from waving to Xander as though Faith wasn't walking right beside him. They passed the Yellowflag. Faith wanted to stop in for a drink but Xander vetoed the idea. He claimed they were in a hurry but in truth, he had left a rather large bar tab behind on his last visit and Bao the bartender would almost certainly want to take it out of his ass. Xander also hurried Faith by the rocking Goof Fest. The last thing Xander needed was for Faith to get noticed by 'Jackpot' Pigeon, who owned the strip club slash whorehouse. Pigeon had always been obsessed with finding new and interesting talent. You could not find more new or interesting then Faith. They passed the bombed out remains of a building that Xander recalled had been the main centre of operations for the Manisarera Cartel. Xander idly wondered who or what had so completely displaced The Colombians.

They eventually found themselves in front of a quaint looking church. Faith looked doubtfully at their destination. "What’s the deal, X-man. I thought we were looking for unsavoury types."

"Yes we are and the Church of Violence is the best place to start.” Faith looked at him doubtfully so he shrugged his shoulders. "OK in truth its a little down the list. With the Black Lagoon not in port the only other person we can talk to is Balalaika and without Dutch there to keep her calm, well… things might get ugly."

Xander knocked on the front door repeatedly but nothing stirred the silence of the church courtyard. Harris checked his watch and rolled his eye. He knocked louder but that only produced a muffled curse from the other side of the door.

"What's wrong," Faith asked, "Is it closed?"

"No, they're open, it’s just early."

"It’s the afternoon. "

"Which for them is early." Xander pushed Faith back out of the way of the door. "You might want to step back. This time of day, surprise guests aren't very welcome. I guess I should have called first."

He then moved off to the side himself and knocked hard on the door. There was a louder and more pronounced curse followed by two gunshots that punched through the door almost, but not quite, where they had been standing.

The door was yanked open and a blonde haired nun wearing angled shades poked her head out. "When I say go the fuck away, I mean go the motherfuck away," She cussed before looking at Faith and snapping at her, "What the fuck do you want?"

"Jesus Christ," Faith yelled, "What the fuck was that about? What kind of church is this?"

"It’s the kind of church that don't like people bothering us so fucking early!" The blonde roared.

"It’s actually the middle of the afternoon, Eda," Xander sighed.

The nun looked around at the man, staring at Xander head to toe before snatching off the shades that hid her eyes. "Xander Harris, un-fucking believable. Guess I win that bet."

"What bet?" He asked suspiciously.

"Oh, I wouldn't want to spoil it." Eda grabbed at Xander's bottom, giving it a healthy squeeze. “Yummy, somebody went out and got nice and buff. I hope you aren't planning on running off again like last time. You look like you've got some real stamina now."

"Yeah, that reminds me; no slipping me funny drinks. I had a headache the size of Mount Rushmore all the way home last time."

"Which head was aching, sweetie?" Eda smiled rakishly. "I just wanted to make sure you wouldn't forget me anytime soon and apparently it worked 'cause here you are."

"Actually I'm here on business. I was hoping to talk to Lagoon Company."

Eda's face fell and a dangerous tone slipped into her voice."If you're back to climb Mount Revy," she growled, "I might have to get jealous."

"I like breathing a little too much to get between you and Revy," Xander responded sarcastically. "Speaking of which; where is the 'goon? They weren't in port when I arrived. They on a job?"

"Yeah, for Fry-face, though frankly with what they make these days they really don’t need to be slumming for that bitch."

"I'm not following. Hotel Moscow and the Lagoon Company are like super tight, what’s changed?"

"The Lagoon picked up a sailor since you were here last. A salary-man named Rock. Balalaika loves his ass something huge and Dutch has been reaping the benefits. Of course I can testify that the guy could negotiate with the Devil his own self if he had to. Half the syndicates are fighting to hire the crew to handle everything from simple fetch and carry to more delicate stuff."

"Dutch must be happy."

"Like a pig in poop. But they still do jobs for Madame Fry-face and she keeps them real busy these days . . .say, bet you she'll be happy to have you back in town."

"Don't bet on it. The business I mentioned, it might bring me into conflict with Hotel Moscow and I want somebody to run interference if I have to go twenty rounds with Ms. Balalaika."

"This sounds serious. You'd best come inside and we'll see what we can do for you."

The three entered the church. It was well maintained. A consequence of the enormous wealth that The Church of Violence possessed due to their infamous smuggling operations which managed to transport products of varying degrees of legality from everywhere on earth to anywhere willing to pay for them. By using the cover of a church doing God's work they could pass through checkpoints and under the notice of authorities both criminal and official.

"Yolanda. Hey, Yolanda," Eda called out, "Guess who came back for more fun."

An elderly nun looked up from a large leather bound ledger. She was sporting an eye-patch like Xander and for a moment Xander felt uncomfortable about his frivolous choice in eye wear.

Yolanda rose to hug him looking him up and down, "Alexander, You've filled out my son. The eye patch is a new look, what happened?"

"Someone wanted to send a message," Xander answered grimly.

"Did you send them one in response?" Yolanda asked,

"Of course, ma’am, I'm told that a person cut in half from crotch to head dies in a very unpleasant fashion."

"Indeed they do." She looked at Faith critically. "Would this noble soul be the person I have to thank for spreading the message of the Church Of Violence?"

"What message is that, ‘guns don't kill people; The Church of Violence does’?" Faith sarcastically tossed in.

"I prefer the more descriptive ‘Payback is a bitch and so am I’," Eda snapped. She tossed herself into a chair with her feet up and chewing her ever-present bubble gum. Xander recalled this was one of the many quirks and fetishes she practiced that had made their first encounter far more enjoyable.

"This is my partner, Faith Lehane. She's a Vampire Slayer. Faith, meet Sisters Yolanda and Eda of the Church of Violence."

The blonde laughed cruelly. "You’re kidding, right? This is the cheerleader slash ass kicker you were always yammering on about?"

"That would be Buffy, I'm the non-cheerleader ass kicker."

"Yeah well, you don't look that tough to me. I bet I could take ya." Eda smiled evilly.

Xander whipped out his hand and rested it gently but firmly on Eda's shoulder bearing her back down in her chair. "Lets not test that shall we. Faith and the rest of the Slayers aren't much for gun-play but I can guarantee that they can hold their own in a straight-up melee fight. In fact, that's why we are here."

"Indeed. Then perhaps a spot of tea as we get down to business, no need to be uncivilized." Yolanda smiled.

Xander smiled. "Excellent, I miss the way you make it."

Yolanda went off to make and prepare tea while Xander kept Eda and Faith from ramping up their obvious hostility. The one-upmanship would have continued until punches were thrown, shots were fired and the building was reduced to kindling. Still, Xander reflected that at least it wasn't Faith and Revy. He shuddered once again at the thought of how that meet-up would go.

Yolanda, bearing the tea and a selection of cakes, eventually joined them. Helping her serve was a tall man who identified himself as Apprentice Priest Rico.

"So, what exactly brought you back here, Mister Harris?" Yolanda asked when they were settled and drinking sociably. "As impressive as Eda's tales of your evening together were, I assumed it was a one time thing."

"How much do you know about the traffic of girls?"

"More then I'd like to. Why?" Yolanda asked dispassionately.

"A few weeks ago a contact brought us a video from a new S&M site. Heaven itself doesn't have the kind of firewalls keeping this site safe from outside interference but we managed to preserve some of the feed. Anyway, it’s pretty strong stuff."

Xander opened a laptop computer and hit a button. Faith had already seen the footage and it disgusted her. She knew Xander had felt the same way. So much so that he had ordered all knowledge of the video suppressed with everyone, Buffy especially, on a need-to-know basis.

Eda and Yolanda looked at the video feed with critical eyes, looking for the tell tale clues that what they were seeing was fake or staged. They watched as a young girl was brutally dominated by a succession of fetish wearing gimps. This was no well-produced fake. The video was horrifyingly real.

"They were bouncing the signal off a bunch of servers around the globe but the trace I ran got lucky." Xander stopped the video to point at a symbol on a far wall that could be seen in the background. "The video was shot at a warehouse whose owners have property near here. I thought it might be a good idea to come personally and see what some good old fashioned detective work can dig up."

Eda glanced away from the screen. "How can she take that much punishment and still be alive?"

"She can't," Yolanda snapped, "Either it's special effects or it's a new kind of snuff film."

"No, it’s worse then that," Xander remarked grimly. "That girl can take the punishment she can because she is, like Faith, a Slayer."

"A Slayer? What are you talking about?"

"Can I assume Eda's friends back in the States didn't tell her about the disappearance of Sunnydale?"

Eda shook her head. "Total information blackout. Still, you hear bits and pieces here and there. I mean, there is a huge-ass lake where there used to be a major American town and I heard about LA. Was that part of it?"

"Sort of, the crew that jacked up LA was allied with the team I run with these days. We had a major situation to deal with. The stakes were high, end of the world high. The solution was to change a few rules of engagement. Had we really known what we were unleashing on the world . . . well, we might still have done it, but we would have prepared better. Ever since then we have been fighting to find and rescue these girls from themselves and more frequently the people who would try and hurt them or take advantage."

Sister Yolanda looked inquisitively at him. "Last time you were here you said there was only one Slayer, what happened?"

"Technically, I was right. Usually there is only one. I had a hand in the reason why there were two for awhile, now there are more."

"How much more?"

"A very conservative estimate pegs the number at being about one percent of the female population of the planet."

"That's still over 16,350 odd women,” Yolanda pointed out.

"You ever read Wonder Woman as a kid?" Xander explained, "Imagine waking up tomorrow with those kinds of abilities?"

"Imagine waking up beside a someone you've been abusing who now has those kinds of powers," Faith countered.

"Don't get me wrong, guys, most of these girls can take care of themselves but this video proves that some does not mean all. As long as any girls are in danger it’s my job and the job of the new Watchers' Council to figure out how to get to them and help them out."

"Aren't you making the broad assumption that this little chickie is an unwilling participant in these matters?" Eda asked coldly.

"Yes, I am and I know how naive that makes me sound but I would rather err on the side of caution as would you."

"Why us?"

"Whoever is behind this isn't just taking dirty pictures. Apparently for a small fortune you can rent yourself a Slayer. I can testify that Slayers properly trained make for a crude but effective military force. Imagine sending someone who can take that kind of punishment after your foes, whoever they may be."

"Interesting," Yolanda muttered. "Rico, could you call your friend in Interpol, you know the one. Ask him if he can send you another copy of that report he was asking about, tell him we might have information for him."

Rico nodded and stepped away from the table. Yolanda turned back to Xander and Faith. "The human trafficking network is large and finding any one type of cargo can be difficult. Most of the world's countries are starting to take official notice of such activities, making the profit margin versus risk factor prohibitive."

"Nice to know you all take such an interest in the welfare of others," Faith muttered sarcastically

"Faith!" Xander snapped

Yolanda held up her hand. "I'm guessing you're early to mid twenties, Miss Faith. No doubt your . . .abilities came to you during your teens and since I can tell you're from South Boston and I can smell the gutter mud on you, girl, clear as day, I'm betting you didn't rush out and start fighting the good fight as soon as you realized how much more capable you were. You did what most of us would do; you tracked down some 'old friends' for a little payback. Tell me Miss Lehane, how good did it feel when you showed them how much stronger you were. Did you enjoy making them grovel and beg for their lives like they tried to do to you?"

"Yolanda, that’s enough," Xander snapped, but Faith cut him off.

"Oh, it felt good, it felt really good. Yeah, I enjoyed it, especially the fear. Xander has no idea how good it feels, but you do, don't you? What it feels like when someone who lived off of your fear and the fear of others looks up in your eyes with terror, knowing that you can do anything to him and he can't fight back. Problem is, I started liking the fear more then the payback. I liked it when they were afraid of me. I liked it so much that one night when a good friend came to me trying to help me, I decided I needed to see that look of fear in his eyes. I needed to see it so bad that to this day I wonder why he trusts me enough to work with me."

Yolanda smiled. "I see why you accompany Mr. Harris. I've noticed he has that effect on people like us." Yolanda turned to Xander. "I assume you are looking to Lagoon Company for assistance in finding these lost lambs of yours."

Xander sighed. "That and the money behind these guys is huge and since the trail leads me here, that means I am either going to be working for or against someone I owe a favour to from the last time I was here."

"You suspect that the resources behind these men might connect with Hotel Moscow."

"I know Balalaika doesn't have a problem making a buck, but I care about these girls. My friends and I feel a responsibility to them and if retrieving them requires . . . an aggressive response I would hope to avoid an unpleasant confrontation with Hotel Moscow."

Yolanda laughed. "Listen to the diplomat. You've certainly learned a trick or two since last you walked these streets, dear, but you know how things are in Roanapur. You want to rescue these girls; Balalaika won't stop you unless it’s worth it to do so. However if it is in her best interest to stop you, it will take a lot more then your clever turns of phrase and your tough little friend to keep you alive."