crossoverfic | Glee/Buffy Crossover

Title:- Definitely and In No Way Like Twilight: The Rachel Berry Story, part one
Author:-jblankbluth
Characters:- Rachel, Will, eventual ensemble
Rating:- PG
Word Count:- 899
Spoilers:-None
A/N:- A crossover between Glee and Buffy. Rachel is a Slayer, Will is her Watcher, and there's conflict.

My name is Rachel Berry. You might laugh because, every time I sign my name, I put a wooden stake after it. But, it's a metaphor. And, metaphors are important. My wooden stakes are a metaphor for me being a Slayer.

I don't mean anything phallic by it.

I am not homophobic. In fact, I have two gay dads. I was made out of love. My two dads screened potential surrogates based on beauty, IQ and physical strength. Then they mixed their sperm together and used a turkey baster. To this day we don’t know which one is my real dad which I think is pretty amazing.

My dads spoiled me. I was taking dance lessons, vocal lessons, hand-to-hand combat lessons—anything to give me a competitive edge.

You might think that all the boys would be after me, but slaying and singing keep me way too busy to date. I try to post a MySpace video of myself singing every day just to keep my talent alive and growing. I don't post myself slaying, because it's supposed to be secret. Anyway, vampires don't show up on film.

You might think that it's hard for anyone, even me, to do it all. Slaying, school, glee—I wish I could say that I had a tremendous system of support besides my dads. But even my fellow members of New Directions don't appreciate my talents, and the cheerleaders...well, they're cheerleaders.

I have a Watcher too, but he could be more supportive. His name is Will Shuester and he's constantly trying to sabotage my career. See, he wants me to spend more time improving my battle skills, but I'm a pretty good fighter. You can't tell because people always manage to throw slushies in my face, but I have good reflexes and I'm handy with melee weapons. Slaying vampires is no big deal, but if I ever want to become the first female Tevye, I need to do some serious preparation.

_________________________________________________________________________________

“Um, I have a new piece we should do for the school's talent show...I needed someone to be the female lead, so I chose...Tina!”

Mr. Shuester tries not to act uncomfortable when he gives leads to someone else, but I'd be uncomfortable too if I was denying a shining star opportunity. He thinks I can't handle everything, but how many times have I died? None.

I think Mr. Shuester is jealous of me. He missed his chance for success and now his only musical outlets are glee club and making his Spanish class sing verb tenses to the tune of Don't Stop Believing. Also, he can never get his hair right, but my hair is always spectacular, even after a night of slaying.

After he hands Tina the sheet music, he glances at me and then looks away. He didn't want me to notice. He's ashamed. Good. He should be.

“Now, I want you to all go home and practice your parts. Um, Rachel? Can I speak to you for a minute?”

I spend a lot of time with Mr. Shuester. Considering what happened with the previous glee club captain, I'm surprised it doesn't send off too many red flags. Mr. Shuester had a talk with me about it because I very often storm out of the room, and sometimes I shout “I'm never doing that again!”

I can see how people might get the wrong idea.

“Yes, Mr. Shue?” I asked.

“I'm concerned that we've both been neglecting our duties and responsibilities--”

“I haven't had many duties to neglect, Mr. Shuester. The last lead you gave me was back in December and--”

“Slaying, Rachel. Slaying.” Mr. Shuester seems tired, almost irritable. He's also been walking funny.

“I can see that being my Watcher and coach of glee club is taking its toll on you. I understand that you don't have my vibrant energy. Few people do. Also, the problems you're having in your personal life would take quite a toll on anyone. I think we need to sort out our priorities and drop an activity that's been getting in the way of what's most important.”

“And that would be?”

“Singing, of course! Listen, Mr. Shue, when I'm an old woman, are my years of slaying going to sustain me? I'll have to stake vampires with a cane! But if I pursue singing, I'll have my whole life planned out for me. I could be a sixty-year old ageless godless, like Bernadette Peters.”

“If you don't practice your fighting, you'll never live to be that old,” Mr. Shuester said.

I'm usually very in control of my emotions, on stage or in daily interactions, but sometimes I get so frustrated! And yes, I'm alright with being a slayer and a singer and a student but Mr. Shuester can just be so...annoying.

“I never asked for this!” I think I shouted at him. I'm usually more respectful to my elders. “It's not fair that I can't pursue my dreams because I'm too busy saving Cheerios or—or handling crossbows, which I'm already perfectly proficient in! If you're so concerned about the school, you go on patrol. Train yourself.”

I stormed to the door, but wasn't quite finished yet. “I'm done being your slave! You think you can control me? It's my life and I'm not going to waste it on you! I'm never doing this again!”